I have been neglecting this place for a while now. And just when I thought I’d only keep it going so I could read and still keep in touch with those I read regularly, I start to get the spark back. The want to write. Not that I’m a good writer by any means but somehow writing here can be theraputic. Sometimes it’s just a way to write things, daily events, that I don’t want to forget and might other wise if I don’t write them down somewhere. And that somewhere is here.
My Father in law had a few small heart attacks last week and is in the hospital. We’ve been going back and forth all week. It took 4 days for him to get out of emergency and into an actual room with a proper bed because the hospital is packed. Hubby’s granmother is also very ill and was admitted on Wednesday to the same hospital. Pancreatic cancer. We’re all happy she’s there finally as she lived on her own and wasn’t taking her pain meds in fear of falling and having no one around to help her. Now that she’s in the hospital, her pain is being properly monitered and she’s comfortable. My time has been between the 2 houses and the hospital. Selling a house and getting a new one ready to move into, is in itself a full time job. I have to admit, I find myself wondering why my stress levels aren’t higher than what I feel they are. But, you know, I think I know the answer to that all ready.
I heard the saying once and can not for the life of me remember from where but it was something along the lines of “stress is a choice”. These words have stayed with me through out the past few months as I have a lot of stressful situations in my life right now that could very, very easily over whelm me. But I don’t choose it. Stress is a choice that I choose not to make. I’ve been faithful to my yoga practice and trying to get deeper into my inner peace. Spirituality is a long winding road with many stops along the way. I choose to laugh. Every day, from the belly.
Today we had no plans. We woke up fairly early thanks to Carter and spent the morning doing what we all enjoy. I had a reaallllyyy good cup of coffee while I colored with Cooper. We had to go to the grocery store so we made a fun family date out of it. We all made the grocery list. We planned all our lunches and delicious dinners and managed to keep it way under budget. A good feeling. We came home and enjoyed a delicious lunch together. My sister then came over during nap time so hubby and I could make our way to the hospital to visit his dad and grandmother. Both were very good visits. We had a stop to make on the way home where hubby tried to fix the new windsheild wiper I had just bought, and ended up breaking it in the process. What a laugh we had together in the busy parking lot before going into the store to get a replacement. We then came home, and while I made a homemade lasagna, hubby had a hot shower and put on p.j.’s. Once dinner was in the oven I did the same. By the time dinner was ready, we were all showered, warm and cozy in our p.j.’s with bellies anxious for the food that was to come. Now it’s the pre bed time play and soon will be bedtime stories followed by cuddles. And once the wee ones are in bed, I’ll maybe enjoy a glass of wine, in my cozsy p.j.’s all cuddled up on the couch.
Sometimes I get high on how delicous life can be. Yes, there’s stress. Yes, there’s craziness. Yes, there’s sadness. But somewhere in it all is good, true inner peace. And there’s nothing like a good, tear producing belly laugh in a busy parking lot, to remind you of that.
